Reality Bites

Sept 2005 - It took me a long while before I finally got back here and continue this thing again. After attending a Cendant training, practicing booking hotel rooms, working in a graveyard shift, I could hardly find time to get this thing going. And of course, after getting a certificate from Cendant (travel agent), I would find myself attending another training again - Expedia (the most dreaded, notorious account of all, as NSI reps say) which made me temporarily abandon this thing.

The very first moment I learned that news, I felt like the walls are closing in on me. Oh God, I could not be in that account. I could not take more than 50 calls a day. Hell no. But after a short while, I got numb. I could no longer feel the fear nor hate. I just felt defenseless, vulnerable, helpless. Nobody could help me out of the desperate situation, not even myself. In my mind I knew it was over, so i succumbed.

Graveyard shift, drowsiness, strangers, airport codes, city and states, airline companies... those are what I'm dealing with now. And I feel alienated again after nearly working for 2 years here. I don't know what awaits me in this new environment. I don't know if I'm gonna be estranged again. But as far as I am concerned, the shit continues until I see a silver lining.

This is reality. I work in a company, they decide for me, they control me, and they own me. I have to follow orders whether I like it or not and I have to live with it. Coz I am an e-Rep. And as long as I am such, I am a company property - I am their property.

I wouldn't talk long for now. Just gonna leave something that I got from a 1953 Issue of New York Times:

Companies are owned by rich men. They are the men behind the scenes and we are their workers. We are the tools and vassals of these rich men. We are the jumping jacks, they pull the strings and we dance. Our talents, our possibilities and our lives are all the property of other men. We are intellectual prostitues.